Feeling the love?

I can't say that I've ever really LOVED Valentine's Day. I find it too in your face, too soppy and too celebratory of something which not everyone has.

I remember the days in secondary school, when everyone was having their first boyfriends, kisses in the corner and the inevitable discos where try hards would act sexy. I had a fair few Valentines days without a boyfriend then, and I felt like the loneliest person in the world.

I think that this Valentine's Day, we should think about the people who are lonely and do our best to make them happy.

It's all well and good to celebrate the love of two people who have been together for a while - and I am very happy to do that while my relationship is so successful - but to reach out to those people who are only reminded of those they could have had or those they have lost is something altogether more special.

Since going to uni, I've felt sorry for my mum. She isn't seeing anyone, and wasn' t when we left. The both of us leaving so suddenly must have been difficult for her to cope with, and she must have felt so alone. So this year I'll be trying to make her happy.

I think that she will really appreciate the simple gesture of kindness, and I hope that when others do the same, it will not go unnoticed.

Making things clear cut

In my view, there is only one way to secure a girlfriend / boyfriend; to make it screamingly obvious you think they're hot from the start. If you make your feelings clear, you do away with the friendship barrier and dive straight in the deep end (ie, a relationship).

I'm not the type to hold my cards close, and so I figure that if I don't keep anything secret, why suppress something as simple as desire?

I think that to be in a relationship, you absolutely have to find the other person attractive physically, otherwise all you have is friendship when you could be out there looking for more. You need to be able to think; 'Yeah, i'd tap that' instead of shying away from the thought like it was measles.

I may not be an expert, but from my experience, I can tell you that playing the long game doesn't work. You confuse friendship with a relationship and it tends to get messy.

I know that for some people, this method can work. But it would take so much time and work, their friend may not be worth it in the end.

I've tried being friends and then inching my way in to being more and I've been cast aside. Apparently they didn't want to ruin the friendship. The fact is, they didn't want a relationship with me because they weren't attracted to me.

I find that people I used to be attracted to have turned into friends so much I no longer think of them as anything more than that. And this is what happens by waiting to make a move; it is always made too late.

When I did go out with a friend once, it really didn't feel right. I knew I liked him a lot as a person, and it seemed like the next step. It wasn't. I didn't even want to kiss the poor guy, and I definately wasn't interested in anything more with him.

No, it is much better to go from being aquaintances to having a thing for eachother. It feels more natural for one thing. And you get to know the rest of them as you go out with them.

Relationships are meant to be an adventure, so finding out new things about them adds to that sense. After a while you learn to love the things you didn't think you would, like a quirk in their behaviour, for example.

Beginning a relationship in this way means you also have a lot to talk about, and you gain a friend and a lover without gaining a line to cross, unlike those friends who turn into more. In fact, I find that the realtionship that begins as friends only ever turns into friends with benefits.

I know people say that to have a good marriage, you should marry your best friend. But I think that if you did marry your best friend, it wouldn't be a relationship, just a partnership, without the lust or romantic love that comes with it. You need to make your other half into your best friend, not the other way round.